Birth Story

Our house is in total chaos.

Packing and under construction.

I am anxious about bringing a baby into that sort of stress.

Loving family open up their home.

We set up house at the Barney's.

January 19, 2011, dilated to a 5 and fully effaced. No contractions.

Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. For a almost a week, no labor.

Januarty 22-23, 2011. My sisters in-law, Brooke and Cami are feeding me spicy food, walking me and anything else they read may induce labor.

We try EVERYTHING!

Nothing.

The morning of Tuesday January 25, 2011 around 630-7am.

Feeling some contractions.

YES!

Woke up da' husband.

"It is time!"

I was anxious, excited, and nervous about this delivery. But feeling those contractions all I felt was joy.

Time to go over the checklist:

Call Karen the midwife. Check

Call Travis' sister, Cami. Check

Call my family. Check

Make sure every bag is ready and in place. Check

Wake up Olivia and take her to Cami's. Check

Now what? I am still having good waves that are getting stronger and stronger. But I don't feel the need to sit down yet. I make beds, I put dishes away. . .there are still things that need to get done.

Meantime, Karen and her assistant, Beth arrive. They set up and check me. Dilated 8cm.

Our birthing pool is already set up and is half filled. Now Travis turns on the warm water and fills it up.

I feel more and more pressure. Time to pull

out the hypnobabies.

I am relaxed and going with the

waves.

The pool is full and just in time. I am

ready to get in.

With Karen.

Things are progressing well. The pool makes a huge difference with the intensity of the contractions.

I was thinking, "Who needs an epidural? This is awesome!"

"I can do this!"

Then it happens. . .I finally feel the difference between an epidural and not having one.

I begin to moan a little.

Then a lot more.

Low, deep moans seem to help me through each contraction.

I am in my own world. Travis is sitting just outside the pool kneeling behind me with his arms under mine and holding me. I feel his support and need him but I am not listening to the conversations going on around me.

Time is slowing down.

I am thinking of my little baby. I am thinking of what my body is doing. I am thinking that this is incredible and also painful.

It is time to push. All of sudden I snap out of my little world and into reality and there is pain and I want to run away from it.

This is embarrassing to admit. I started pulling away from the pain. Instead of going with the contraction and pushing into it, I withheld.

I was very aware of my body opening up and it hurt.

I let doubt enter my thoughts. I felt ashamed of my doubt. All of a sudden my feelings become confusing.

What am I doing?

Am I strong enough for this?

The next thing I hear is Karen calmly saying, "Don't run away from the pain."

I am back. I can do this. I am strong. I am not going to run away from the pain.

I reach up behind my head and hug Travis' head.

This is incredible.

I have an overwhelming feeling of love for this man. I am so grateful to not be doing this alone. He is here with me.

The baby is coming.

It hurts but I know now that I can do this. I hear myself moaning and it is getting more and more intense.

I push.

I push.

I push for not quite a half hour.

The head comes out.

Then Karen has me move around. I sense some anxiety.

Then Karen tells me to get up out of the water and sit on the birthing stool.

I don't hesitate, I don't question her. Her tone says it all.

I get up with a head between my legs and sit on the birthing stool. With Karen now guiding the body. I push.

My dear sweet little man is born.

11:19am after only 4 hours of labor Devlin Travis Barney is laying in my arms.

His umbilical cord is short and I am hunched over holding him close. Nothing else matters. He is healthy and well.

10lbs. 11 1/2 oz, 22 1/4 inches

There have been so many feelings and thoughts about Devlin's birth. Would I do a natural birth again? Would I do one at home? Do I recommend water births? The answer to all those questions is yes. I have never felt so alive and present as I did with this birth. I had no idea he was going to be that big (no diabetes, no sugar problems or other signs) Now that I have delivered a little giant, I know I can do another.

I am so in love with my little family. What a blessing to be a part of this gift from God to create. I am so grateful to be a woman and to know of the power and beauty of what my body can do.

Every day I cuddle up to my little man and look at him with unconditional and eternal love. He helped me realize my weakness to run from pain and through this I have learned to push into the pain. (this is a profound lesson for me)

Devlin later that day.